right now, i'm more alone than ever. what's worse than fighting this war, is fighting it on your own. i have to learn to toughen up, to protect myself from the savageries and casualties. i have to find a way to focus on that blurred goal just out of reach. using all my energy not to push forward, but just to focus on that point ahead. i feel more alone than ever. it's no surprise, that i'll have to learn how to protect myself and find a way to get to the end, all by myself. trying to fly is tough when you can't even stand on your own two feet. i don't need you any more than i need the sun, and right now, my world is pitch black. the faintest sliver of the stargazer's light blinds my eyes. human affection is like an infectious disease, once you've recovered from it, you're immune to it. when you're alone you realise your world is silent; when you're silent you realise your world is void of life. because someone once said, "hold on to what you've been given lately, cause the world will turn if you're ready or not."

time to take my mind off you with whatever the drug store has, but the best they've got is a prescription of math, a shot of bio, an IV drip of econs and a powerful anesthetic called chem. which drug will be worthy of an overdose and a one-way-trip to hell? it's tough to pick your poison when the easiest pill to swallow is caught in your windpipe.