some people are just so lucky... they just dunno how lucky they are to have someone who will wait for them, who will always be there no matter what... on your good days and bad days, who will be there to put a smile on your face when your feeling down, and to share your joy and laughter... it may all sound so cliche but it's something i think i'm willing to sacrifice alot for... to have the feeling of being needed, wanted... we all think that we are capable of being noble in the name of love, but sometimes it just becomes so difficult when you feel so alone... i've never believed in someone who is able to keep giving and ask for nothing in return, at least not anyone human... you can keep caring for someone, keep giving them love and attention, only if you get some in return, something that gives you the strength to carry on... just something that gives you the motivation to keep trying, just so that you wont give up... and its all the small things that really matter... its not about the big presents or the outward display of love, but sometimes all it takes is a smile, one that really shows how much you appreciate the other person... you cant show what you dun feel, its in your body language and the look of your eyes... some people are just so lucky, they just dunno how lucky they are...

can you really love someone if your heart is not there? her heart is somewhere else right now, and it really pains me to know that, maybe i'm not really the one... when all along i've been painting this pretty picture of flowers and meadows in my head... why can't we all have fairytale endings? or are fairytale endings too perfect for the real world, and should only be kept for, fairytales? i've nvr wanted to admit this for fear that it might actually come true (if it hasn't already), i will just nvr be good enuff for her... no matter what i do, no matter how hard i try, i just wont be good enuff for her... if you could only see how much i care... thats one thing about being able to feel again, you feel hurt... at least the pain lets you know that your alive... you might not be perfect, but your as close to it as anyone can get... i dun really want the world to see me, i just dun want to be invisible to you... why does it have to be so complicated... you deserve so much better, really... maybe this one time, the one thing i have to sacrifice, will be the one thing that i can't let go...

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be, and I don't want to go home right now.