it has been exactly a year and 1 day since i first started blogging, and it has been 5 years and 1 day since the world trade centres came crashing down (freak lah, yesterday wanted 2 blog but was chionging ERP so nvr managed 2 blog, damn)... all around the world there was a sense of reminiscing, a sense of mourning and respect 4 the innocent lives lost 2 the world trade centre bombings... and exactly on that very day a year ago i wrote my first post (haha, i know it has nowhere near importance of 911, but its quite cool 2 talk about it in the same breath)... frankly i oso dunno why my blog is such a big thing, i even missed the actual date lah... lol... yeah but anyway, yesterday marks the 1 year mark 4 my blog, been lotsa crap written here and good stuff 2 (i guess), hopefully with lots more 2 come... lol... the anniversary of 911 has brought many stories (mainly from the US of course), some quite touching, like the pool of water where the 2 towers once stood... its been 5 years, and people have everything except forgotten about it, and the fight against terror continues...

so well, like i said i was chionging my ERP last night, finished it around 12 plus so i couldnt exactly blog lah... then i came 2 skul 2day and found out that albar nvr come, which is a good thing but at the same time i have that screwed over feeling chionging ERP 4 nothing when the eng rep nvr collect oso... at least its outta the way and i had a free period 2day, lol... other than the free period 2day, it was pretty sian with SS, chinese and maths... only fun lesson was geog 2day when we watched some jap anime cartoon about some raccoons... it was damn funny and lame lah, where the raccoons would transform in2 different stuff 2 kick some serious human ass... lol, it was damn interesting and funny and (definitely) very slack... after skul i kinda ponned the ambassador series talk thingy cuz had tuition, really no choice lah... dunno wat they will do 2 me oso, detention? hai, well its over so there's nothing much i can worry about lah... came home slept and had tuition, then basically slack until now lah... i'm sittin here on a tuesday night when i should be watching Life As We Know It, but sadly since it ended like 2 weeks ago i have no more post-tuition tues night entertainment... but i maybe its a good thing oso lah, with CT coming up and alot of muggin 2 be done... still kinda miss that show though (withdrawal symptoms?), cursing the producers 4 not making a 2nd season... well talking about tests and what not, having a probable maths TA this week with chinese CCT (kinda late huh?) on thurs as well... next tues have geog OBA and on wed have maths test, not 2 mention the physics pt that is kinda due on friday (4 me and jon gan lah, lol)... so thats basically my academic highlights 4 this 2 weeks lah... cant help it but 2 constantly thinking about the amount of time left b4 CTs, or more like amount of time left b4 CTs are over, trust me i'm not worried about how much time i have left 2 mug (actually a little lah), but more of JUZ WANNA GET IT OVER AND DONE WITH!!! i think i've said it far 2 many times but i really want it over... lol... so anyway, 2morrow there's no RE cuz all the periods have been swapped 4 acad periods!?!?! good cuz there's no more RE but kinda sian cuz i have triple science again 2morrow lah, as good as a full day... hai but i'm kinda looking 4ward 2 abit of soccer 2morrow, plus gym, plus a little tennis 2morrow? haha, kinda like the game of tennis, juz hands and fingers a little itchy for some tennis lah, lol... if all goes well 2morrow (without a last minute training), i'd be able 2 excute my plans ba...

well that's basically it, up til now lah... i still have chinese yingyong wen and physic pt 2 chiong so i'd better get down 2 doing them (soon, lol)... well, b4 anything else juz wanna say that its danny's birthday 2day and 4 the like the dunno-how-many-times 2day here's wishing him a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! lol... i also wanna thank david lee (tapitoo) tat wai 4 everything man, been a real true friend man... ok think i'll end here and get down 2 serious business already, til the next time i check back in, peace...

well i juz came back from cutting my hair and, as always, it is cocked up again, but like i always say cut so nice oso 4 wat, no1 want 2 see... lol... hai, doesnt matter wat i cut now cuz in about 1 or 2 months when i next cut my hair everything is gonna go (or at least most of it lah, lol)... so 2day, the last official day of skul hols, was quite semi-eventful... played tennis in the morning, woke up at like 7 again... so went down 2 the courts and stuff, played with my parents and my aunts, really had alot of fun... seriously damn nice 2 play, only downside was the ball picking cuz we didnt have enuff balls lah (no pun intended watsoever)... i must admit it was quite easy and i think i played ok 4 a beginner (beginner's luck?), or maybe cuz everyone else was above 30 so i kinda owned their asses? hmmmm... but seriously it was quite fun, wouldnt mind playing again, maybe after CTs or something get the other guys over 2 play or something lah... hahaha, can already imagine that being a disaster... lol, maybe should ask ryan teo oso...

so anyway, after that was kinda wiped (cuz we played 4 like 2 hours lah, damn geng), came home took a nice a refreshing shower (one of the best in recent times lol) and watched The Pink Panther... lol, that show was really quite dumb, all the lame jokes and stuff, purely 4 stupid non-intellectual humor (which i quite enjoy)... call me stupid or dumb or watever, but it was nice a show... starrin beyonce oso, and she is really quite hot in the show although it doesnt really revolve around her lah... i like the way almost everyone in the show has this damn funny french accent, especially steve martin (the lead actor)... like all damn natural like that lah, seriously damn funny... kinda like the theme song 4 the show by beyonce oso... so after watching the movie, had lunch then knock out til about 6 lah... damn tired, but woke up feeling even more gloomy cuz my whole afternoon kena burned like that, STILL WITH MY ERP NOT DONE!!! i am so fucking screwed lah... well, i have 32 days b4 CTs (1 month and 1 day), i have about 7 weeks til i go my braces thingy again, and exactly a term (10 weeks) b4 skul kills off 4 a EOY hols of 6 weeks... those are my numbers, constantly telling myself that all i nidda do is survive those numbers (and probably a couple of other stuff along the way) and i'll be fine... so back 2 my ERP, hopefully imma chiong a little of that later b4 i watch a kinda "blown up" game, west ham vs aston villa... dunno why everyone is making such a big hype about the 2 argentinians but i guess it would be a good game 2 watch oso lah, hope west ham win lol (wth man, how did i end up talking about soccer?)... anyway, 2morrow's skul again (4 all you people whom have drifted ur hols away like me, not knowing how oso), and i'm kinda mixed emotions about going back lah (i guess everyone is like that)... its good 2 be back with the guys? but the tests and assignments and pts are kinda appalling, it always seems that way? lol, but wat heck man, juz wanna go back 2 the books and get everything over and done with, so i dun have 2 friggin worry about skul anymore (at least 4 a good 6 weeks ba?)... b4 u know it, sec 4 comes around and its ur last year already... well, its 1 final push with a fresh clean slate (school wise ba?), so better make the most of it, but 4 now juz gotta survive the final days of sec 3 man...

so i've been blog hopping (kinda i guess?) last night and i came across some quite funky stuff, like discovering that nigel sim actually knows christina and vice versa, after conveniently seeing a photo they took 2gether on kevin's blog... hahaha, nearly laughed my head off... but really kinda shocked and surprised lah... lol... anyway, i read david lee's blog yesterday and i thought wat he wrote was kinda interesting... here's the link btw go check it out: http://waterwindows.blogspot.com/ the entry is wed, sept 6 titled "Death & Tapitoo"... lol, funky title but from it u can kinda guess wat's comin next... i thought wat he wrote was really quite interesting, about dying... he says that when he dies, he wants 2 be 4gotten, and not remembered, unlike wat most people would think... that thought really struck me at that moment, cuz i thought it was quite true... i mean when i die, i want 2 be 4gotten 2, i dun want people 2 mourn over me (well i might juz get my wish cuz no1 will be there in the 1st place but anyway) cuz i'm not worth it with all the sins i've committed... i dun deserve it man, i dun want 2 do any more harm even after i'm gone... i want the people closest 2 me 2 live their lives like i nvr existed, they'd probably be better off... life (so cliche but so very true), is like a shooting star, you shine so brightly 4 juz a moment as you fall from the sky, and after that you're gone, only awaiting the next star 2 come crashing down from the heavens, with every one brighter than b4... really love david's post and it kinda got me thinking 2 man... wont repeat everything here so you'd oughta go check it out... and yeah maybe death izznt such a bad thing after all (especially 4 some choice people out there), maybe there's a better place out there... b4 i end off, i'll give you guys a feast 4 the eyes (at least 4 some of you lah), no worries its clean (mostly, no children under 12 though, lol)... this new band called Danity Kane, from the show on mtv "Making The Band 3", with p. diddy making a band of chicks (as the name suggests) lah... their single "Show Stopper" quite catchy, kinda grew onto it the moment i heard it... one of their members (aundrea) reminds me of stacie orrico... lol... so as i sign off, i present Danity Kane... peace...

well (if y'all look carefully and notice) i changed the blogskin... it was a really simple skin but i dunno how i ended up taking so long juz 2 finish putting it up... yeah, like i said it was really simple (it is), thought it was a good change of things from the black 2 the refreshing white, didnt really catch my attention at 1st but grew onto its simplicity... haha, feel its quite nice lah but pardon me if the words abit hard 2 read cuz i word spammage (4 those who dun like it can f*** off, not many readers here anyway, lol)... so anyway, did this last night after which went 2 watch thirteen ghosts (at least some of it lah, quite freaky dun dare 2 watch it myself), watch half-half til bout 1 (which means that ERP was NOT done, lol)... surprised i woke up on time this morning, but still ended up rushing and barely making it 2 SBC on time... realise i keep rushing these couple of days 2 make it 4 like trainings or juz simple appointments, last time (if i remember correctly) i'm usually early or punctual, i'd be there waiting 4 people but now its more like people waiting 4 me... damn, guess it all comes down 2 discipline, must make an effort to reach on time man (more of cuz hols now and slacker, but still no excuse)... also realised that 4 this whole entire hols week i have not slept past 830 in the morning (damn, thats really pathetic and painful especially on hols man, ur supposed 2 friggin sleep in)... mon did geog, tues had tuition (freak man), wed training, thurs gym, fri training, sat training and sun tennis... yeah gonna play tennis 2morrow morning at like 8 in the morning... so combined skuls training 2day was sian (as usual), not tiring but more of sian... sometimes ur juz not physically drained but more emotionally drained, still feel dead both ways... the coach 2day got up on the wrong side of the bed man, 1st come and punish us do suicides then training time whole day stop the play 2 screw people, every single friggin time (with myself on the receiving end most of the time)... listen already oso sian ah... praying 4 this whole thing 2 end so that i can stop taking shit like this man... lol...

after combined skuls training went gym with danny... 1st time i'm not going tp gym alone, quite cool... so did couple of stuff 2day, tried my best 2 keep as close 2 muscle man training thingys as possible, hoping 2 see results ba (but its only the 1st time so we'll juz have 2 see ba)... danny left early so i continued 2 gym then went home... tp was friggin packed by some superstar thingy, so many people i couldnt even walk let alone eat there, so went home 2 eat... then on the way home saw my sis eng tuition teacher (the hot 1, name's ms. jerry, lol), quite surprised but nvr do anything oso lah... went home wanted 2 sleep but went out 2 IKEA 2 do some shopping... bought swivel chairs 4 my bedroom and the study, sweet man... cheap and good, looks pretty decent as well... IKEA was another disaster, damn bloody packed, the friggin car park entry was more than a 100m long, could barely put ur foot down without stepping on someone else and the cashiers were having absolute nightmare (so were we, but they more kelian)... finally got out of that place, drove all around 2 find dinner but ended up eating at a regular place back in woodlands... happy with the new swivel chair, not much but happy... out and about the whole day, which means that my ERP is still not done!!! haha, i'm screwed lah... 2morrow morning and afternoon more or less wiped already, but must be determined 2 finish the ERP b4 2morrow night so that at least i can wind down 1 last time b4 skul starts again...

sometimes in life you'll meet people i'd like 2 call "haters"... damn aren't they a f***** up bunch, lol... hai, but at the end of the day you still gotta live with them whether you like it or not, so might as well shove ten feet poles up their asses as well... haha... but seriously, damn i'm not gonna stop doing wat i do or stop writing wat i write, cuz hell this is my place man, yeah sure everyone is invited but if you dun like wat i write then you can jolly well take your bitch asses and get the hell outta here, no1's forcing you 2 stay, you read watever that is written here at your own risk... lol... sorrie if i have offended anyone that i have no intentions 2 offend watsoever with my straightforwardness, but there's no need 2 be all sugarcoated in honey and caramel 4 stuck up bitches man... life's messed up, you dun like wat you read here then go find a place where people say nice things and tell you you're pretty, cuz you sure as hell ain't... think i'm being a real asshole (not 2 mention stepping on the line of being hypocritical and bitchy), and i'm affirming that by saying "go screw yourself some place else, or at least where people like you are needed"... haha, i could go on 4ever and i must say that sure felt good... lol... well, at least i got one thing outta the way... dun really have much else 2 say, at least until someone else comes along and pisses me off, then i'll really have a fun time... lol... think all of this is eminem's fault... haha, with all my respect man... say watcha wanna say about me man, you dun mean shit 2 me cuz you're so full of it, right up 2 ur friggin neck man... bitch can f*** off and die... once again pardon my out-the-mouth trash, juz feel like dissin' man... ok, til next time, peace out...

well, its late afternoon on a friday and i'm surprised i'm not sleeping my life away (but neither am i doing anything productive with it)... juz came back from some x-ray thingy 4 my braces... well, 4 those of u who are following the story or are even interested (mostly only bballers), x-ray shows that i DO NOT in fact have an extra tooth... which means no surgeries 4 me watsoever (at least 4 now), but have 2 remove 4 teeth (premolars 2 be exact) b4 my braces can be fitted in2 place... nothing much 2 worry now cuz everything would be after CTs (damn, no excuse 2 pon skul), might have 2 do some root canal thingy 2 cuz of my messed up tooth, now that 1 i'm quite freaked out, but overall really relieved that i dun have an extra tooth and dun have 2 go 4 surgery... saw my wisdom tooths oso (all 4 of them), quite cool yet at the same time freaky, gotta remove all of them sooner or later (hopefully during NS ba), damn tempted 2 ask the dentist 4 my x-ray film 2 keep cuz it was pretty darn cool...

enuff about the orthodontics thingy, moving on 2 some bigger stuffs... realised lately how fragile life can really be... i mean with the passing of steve erwin and a fellow rafflesian, it juz brings life right up in your face with no false pretenses or sweet nothings, juz the cold harsh facts about reality... its not juz the passing of these 2 souls, but its the way they were taken from us... it juz makes u think about life, a painful reminder that life is the way it is (or that life's a real bitch)... i mean i'm in no position 2 say i know everything about life and how it works, but juz thinking about how scary it is, 2 have everything taken from you in juz a blink of an eye... i'm sittin here right now typing these words as i see them on the screen, i should be thankful that i'm given the opportunity and that i'm lucky 2 have the things i have, but somehow it juz doesnt sink in until something bad really hits u... people can say that u shouldnt take things 4 granted and that u should appreciate things around u, but none of them can really mean it until something has changed their lives, until they themselves experience it... i cant say that i'm a saint or an angel or anything of that sort (nothing close), because i'm guilty of taking things 4 granted, not appreciating wat i have, always complaining about stuff, making other people's lives a livin hell and stuff like that... but its juz things like these, that make you stop and think, probably wont do you much good if it doesnt directly affect you but at least it make you think, and 4 that split moment you start 2 wonder what all this really means, what life is really all about, but most importantly you start 2 appreciate that little bit you have... no1 is perfect, guess everyone's like that, you juz let the world pass you by day after day, never really holding on but letting go everyday... i know i've said all of these far 2 many times, and i'm still sayin it cuz i'm a little hypocritical bastard... at least i truly feel this way, it may not last very long and b4 u know it i'm that little shit thats bitchy about every little thing again, but til then i hope i can do something about it man... yeah u cant change everything in the world, but change wat u can around u, or at least try 2...

hai, i'm so foolish... gettin all emotional again, especially last night at like 1 am in the morning... juz couldnt help but 2 think about everything again... you cant blame me (i think?), its really not easy 2 4get someone like you (but i guess u can take rocket-propelled grenades and shove them up my ass 4 repeating myself over and over again on my blog)... juz so full of everything (including crap), so much so i even tried 2 write a poem but it turn out like crap (when was the last time i wrote a poem, used 2 be quite good at it) and was a total turn off... i still cant help but 2 think about you, when i'm alone in the middle of the night wishing you were there 4 me 2 hold... i really dunno wat 2 say anymore, cuz everything's been said before... i still wish and dream about us being back together, but given the chance it would never materialise because i know our feelings are different now, and it can never be the way it once was... i cant let go of the past, while i'm searching for my future... i guess i'll have 2 deal with it like everyone else, eat shit and move on... i dunno whether 2 wish 4 your happiness or painfully dissect every limb and make juice with ur partner's organs, but since being the immature jerk i always was, i'll wish for your eternal (does anyone still believe in "forever"?) happiness... "maybe love will be nice in someone else's life (taken from stacie orrico)"... think i should juz stop here b4 everything starts 2 get 2 cheesy or b4 i break down... i'm really at a loss 4 words right now, my emotions are gripping me so tightly i wish they would juz choke me 2 death, or at least put me out of my misery... i keep telling myself to give you up and 4get about you, but deep down i never want 2, even if i have 2 suffer like this... maybe the day i really clean you completely from my memory, hell will actually freeze over... so i'll drown myself in tears or strangle myself with emotions, either way i'm going... til i come back, peace...

juz finished tuition, woke up at like 830 this morning juz 4 the stupid thing... 1st time in a long while i've been at ease, or at least relaxed so imma make full use of it, while it lasts... finally got the super uber big geog thingy outta the way (probably why i'm chilled right now), handed it up yesterday, didnt know which pigeon hole 2 put in lah... then i was like heck care juz shove it in OWL's pigeon hole... as long as i handed it up... after that went tp gym, did the same stuff again, not 2 hardcore cuz had game after that... had time 2 kill after gym so went all the way back 2 tp central there 2 the popular 2 slack around... saw this damn cho chick in popular, should be a teacher cuz she was there shopping 4 maths assessment books? but seriously she was quite cho... so spent like 20 mins there wasting time (not all of it was used 2 stare at the cho bu)... saw tata young's new album, damn tempted 2 buy (not because of the cover, if u dunno wat i mean stop by any cd shop go see), maybe i'll juz go download (if only the peps upload her songs lah, whole day no sources 1 wth)... so after that took 28 to paya lebar, one of my worse nightmares ever man... at first still ok, damn empty only a few people, suddenly reach this place (dunno where lah, must be hell on earth) the whole friggin bus stop was full (and i mean really full) and like the whole world wanted 2 board that 1 tiny bus (point 2 note, that 28 bus was NOT a doubledecker)... bloody heck man, the whole bus juz exploded like that... all the way until sing post, got off 1 stop later than planned and had 2 walk 2 SBC... remind me 2 nvr take 28 to paya lebar at 6 o'clock in the evening ever again... so after that had the game with the singapore womens team... seriously a damn funky experience, they are somewhat slower than us but by no means any less skillful (i think given a better predisposition, they'd be as good if not better than us)... and playing with the womens team feels abit weird, as in u wouldnt play as if u were playing with other 15 year old guys (seriously, no jokes), there's alot less contact (i think lah) and is somehow juz different lah... at least that was how i felt... serene was there oso (RJ, J2 bball captain? featured in some basketball mag), and i must say she is really quite cho... lol... as in seriously, not that kind of "ogling" cho but the "cho" kinda cho... u get wat i mean... she's super small and super fast oso, like those damn nifty small quick forwards kinda thing... the other guys were also talking about her so no surprise that she's quite popular eh? lol... she way outta our league (at least she way outta MY league, dunno wat chances the other guys stand but anyway), still i believe anything can happen eh? lol... so after the game (which ended like 8++), went 2 macs there 2 eat with zf and danny b4 the rest of the guys joined us... went in and saw this 2 chicks (seriously, chicks) muggin at 1 of the tables, cant help but notice cuz 1 of them seriously damn cho (becoming a day of cho-ness)... so we were minding our business and eating our food, and when we (danny and me) left, i could have sworn the cho 1 smiled at us (dunno who she was smiling at oso lah but she was smiling in our direction)... so i was like "wow, ok"... but then danny wiped that thought from my mind, made me feel kinda dumb but anyway we walked 2 the bus stop 2 take 28 back lah... then juz as we were about 2 board, there were the chicks again!!! seriously man, i was like WTF!!! damn dead sure it was them at the bus stop, followed us? but once we boarded the bus i juz wiped everything from my mind already, dun wanna look like a fool, cuz i dun even know 4 sure, might juz be pure coincidence ba (but they didnt have anything with them at the bus stop, wat about all their muggin stuff? hmmm)... it was seriously an interesting run of events 2 end off the night, sure had a damn good sleep lah... lol... somehow feels damn sad case lah, i could have gotten a chance 2 know them but didnt... hai, later they only interested in danny (danny is not half bad at all, one thing he might be really charming? hmmmm)... i should stop thinking about these kinda things already, although it does keep ur mind occupied 4 abit... so now i'm here stoning, waiting 4 my sis 2 end her tuition... juz wanna chill out juz 4 2day, b4 i really have 2 get back in2 that muggin mood already (courtesy of danny, thanks man sincerely)... really hafta get back in2 the books and mug, cant afford 2 slack off anymore, b4 u know it the sept hols are gonna be burnt like nobody's business man... think i'll end here and continue slacking 4 abit, still listening 2 eminem's songs, seriously damn nice... tryna get guilty conscience? wanna have a listen... ok lah, i'll chao and listen 2 Under The Influence, nice song... til next time, peace...

yay finally finished my geog pt!!! dunno why i'm cheering oso cuz its already like 4 days late... i'm so friggin screwed... somehow i dun feel all that relieved, maybe cuz i havent actually handed the thing up, but i'm quite proud of it all the same... ok maybe i shouldnt talk about this already, stop thinking about work 4 abit... juz hope i dun get minus marks can liao... ok moving on, so later i have some combined skus friendly with the womens national team... some how quite looking 4ward to that (please dun start thinking the wrong way), juz in that game mood all of a sudden... juz hope nothing screws up... feel like going gym later, but dunno whether can or not cuz my mum juz friggin came home (half day? wtf man?)... sianded... 2morrow morning i friggin have tuition (hols still tuition, bloody hell) at 9 in the morning lah... but at least after that can go play ps2 (after miraculously completing my geog pt, juz cant stop saying it lol), relax a little... this week is pretty much laid out b4 me already, wed and fri training, plus thurs gym with muscle man, sat combined skuls and sun 2 live the very last moments of freedom... this thurs gonna go 4 my dental check up 4 my braces oso... butterflies in my stomach? scared yet excited lah, more like get it over and done with kinda feeling... juz wish everything would juz whizz by in a flash and the next thing i know i'd be removing my braces already!!! lol... hai, hope everything goes well lah...

been listening 2 eminem lately, kinda inspired by the movie 8 mile (watched it not 2 long ago on star movies)... nvr knew he had so many nice songs from his albums gone and passed, like My Name Is, The Way I Am, Still Don't Give A F*** and Under The Influence... really love these songs, although i'm still tryna get a hold of his other songs from the albums "The Slim Shady LP" and "The Marshall Mathers LP"... maybe i'd pop by HMV one of these days 2 go find? seriously relit the passion i had 4 eminem's songs... totally rocker...

b4 i start running out of topics 2 talk about, here are some random pics i took:

My bedroom

(i know its nothing much, but i had a camera from geog pt + nothing better 2 do = random pics)

My Desk

(once again, random pics)

Evanescence

(absolutely nothing 2 do with anything from above, but love their song "Call Me When You're Sober" from their latest album The Open Door, out 3rd Oct)

Enjoy! (juz dun get 2 freaked out can liao, lol)

havent been bloggin in a while, really been out and about these couple of days... well this week was really quite slack, ended all my dmps and this term of skul for that matter... wed no skul but had training in the morning after which went 2 coach's office 2 play... went there wanted 2 do work, but its common knowledge that it was going 2 be impossible, so not bettin on any work done... played a little of winning eleven, halo 2 and CS... didnt really play much oso, after that went 2 cuppage with az stanley and kee yao 2 play pool, kena freaked out by some guy and left early... felt it was kinda wasted so hung around with az and stanley until it was time 2 go home... thurs went 2 skul 4 teachers' day celebrations, well it was once again kinda screwed... i guess i was abit critical about the national day celebrations oso cuz the venue is seriously hard 2 plan 4 fun activities, so as this teachers' day celebrations... with that said, it was still screwed... ended up wasting away 1 hr listening 2 music in class and doing up cards that no1 really meant 4 any of our teachers... was the 1st time i really felt no meaning watsoever 2 teachers' day at all... then went JB atrium and stoned again, entertainment from jon gan's band? nice songs i feel... after that went back 2 skul alone (after failing 2 meet angie), met up with all the guys and saw mrs. beins, mr. see, mr. heng, mr. tan all... quite hard 2 believe it has only been 3 years since i stepped out of that skul, it feels like ages, but the people nvr seem 2 change... bing gui and wen hao changed alot though, nearly couldnt recognise them... feels good 2 be back with the old guys, abit short on topics, but hit off after awhile... hopefully 2 see them again this sept hols...

yesterday, went 2 redhill (again) to see some game maker, mr. henry ong regarding our RE... gonna patent our game and sell it, somewhere along that line... from RE failures 2 RE congress nominees (fat hope)? anyway, spent like 4 hours in a "meeting" with that guy and the other RE group only 2 come out realising that our board game sucks and theirs is quite good... on the other hand, i oso realised that our game has more appeal in terms of detail and quality, whereas they have the content... so hafta see how it goes, hopefully our hardwork, no matter good or bad, doesnt go 2 waste... now i'm not so interested in the money (cuz i dun even know whether can get the funding), but it would sure be a nice incentive and reward... now juz pray he speaks good of us in front of cheryl yap... after that ate with the guys, shit loads of fats and oil shoved down my throat cuz damn hungry, felt abit guilty so went 2 gym after that in redhill delta complex... bloody huge place, biggest 1 i've been in i think, but not many "useful" stuff... only got 1 bench press (which i did not manage 2 do), alot of machines (which i try 2 stay away from as much as possible) so basically not much done... best gym so far is still clementi... so juz did abit then chao 2 meet az they all 4 movie... watched the devil wears prada with az, danny, stanley and simon (simon!!! 1st time i see him out)... the show was not bad but could tell all the chicks in there were abolutely flippin out... definitely a chick flick (girls would love it lah), but got anne hathaway so not 2 bad oso lah... would have much prefered 2 watch something else but a nice change of movie taste... saw alot of peps there, some RI guys (nigel?), ex-RI teachers (!!!) and even jing yi (ask around if u dunno who that is)? not surprised being a skul hol... danny left after the movie leaving the rest of us 2 slack around... basically juz walk about aimlessly, went 2 far east there and bought stuff... saw even more people along the way, grace chong and even some actress from quite awhile back? so much so that it turned in2 a who-can-spot-the-most-(hot)-people-we-know contest... i keep saying i see ms cho... lol... of all people we meet, i juz couldnt bump in2 the only person i wanna see right now in the whole world... so after that ate in BK (slowly becoming a real favourite if not already) then rocked myself home with simon...

so 2day another day of out-ness (is it even a word?)... had training in the morning, ate with the rest of the guys and went gymming after that alone again in tp... hai, i realised i abit sad life, but since when it wasnt? not gonna be spared next week oso, with combined skuls game on mon, trainings, gymming (a particular 1 with muscle man?), and hopefully try 2 squeeze in some work and ps2 and outing along the way... 1 week of hols burned like that already...

dunno why i juz felt so bitter on teachers' day celebrations... juz my emotions gettin the better of me again... why cant i juz seem 2 let go? am i juz pretending all this while? i've ran through it a thousand times in my head, and on that very day i was going 2 do it... i had everything ready and prepared, the only thing that i left out was that it would nvr get that far... juz really started 2 drown myself in my emotions again... the rain was pouring like it nvr meant 2 stop, i juz didnt have the guts 2 do it... these few days juz keep thinking, keep letting myself go with no control... why does this day make any more an impact than any other day? i bet my life that on fri i was going 2 bump in2 you... guess it was not going 2 happen... then wat about all those times? does this mean that it is really over? it has been over, i juz nvr accepted it nor have i believed it... at the back of my mind i hold this tiny flicker of hope, that we will be back together again... is this a sign? that i'm the fool again? cant stop thinking about you... i know that you're not thinking about me 2... then why am i feeling like this?

got a couple of new songs lately, downloaded like half the veronicas album... totally think their style is quite cool, semi-rock semi-pop... like the song "everything i'm not" and "speechless", have a listen (although its not 1 of their singles)... evanescence "call me when you're sober" is another nice song, cant wait 4 their album "The Open Door" out 3rd october... expecting big things, amy lee is quite hot in the video btw... still yet 2 get the Panic! At The Disco and Paramore album from danny, one of these days... paramore album out in HMV, but at 37 bucks its daylight robbery... sampling from danny tells me that paramore are going 2 do big things in the future... worth a listen, totally awesome... think i'd end off already, already late in geog pt which i should be doing now... i'm screwed, somebody tell me that... get it over with so i can cry peacefully... 1 week, b4 all hell breaks loose... signing out, peace...

When It Never Came, Yet